Abby is a good friend. [ Abby is like him, he thinks, a person capable of terrible things. Neither of them has discussed it, whatever looms in their respective pasts, but he knows it's there. ]
I think she could forgive it.
Alternatively, I could bribe her into coming along. She'd probably be amused by that, actually.
[ She's not sure if that's true, but Loki would know better than her. She really hasn't spent much time getting to know anyone here, and alternately Loki seems to have made some connections in the time he's been here. She takes a soft breath, her next words a bit more serious. ]
I'm still waiting for it to fall spectacuarly apart, but somehow it hasn't, yet.
[ It'll probably happen when he's least expecting it. Seems like the sort of trick fate would play on him. ]
I'm not popular, by any stretch of the imagination. The native variant wasn't either, honestly, but I'd like to think I'm doing a little better in that regard.
[ Has Loki crafted visibly thriving friendships as a big competition between himself and a version of him that doesn't even know he exists?
[ Popular enough to have kept his wife it seems, and she's quiet suddenly, musing on that. Maybe the way they felt about each other was not as similar as she had thought; and she needed to just come to terms with that. She had said it herself after all.
I am not you.
She could be happy enough that he even wanted to talk to her after what she's done couldn't she? ]
I'm sure it won't; collecting friends seems to be in your nature. Part of being the charismatic prince.
[ Unlike her, within the few days they'd been on the same path he had collected all sorts along the way. In the end, she always ended up alone. ]
I'm familiar with using people, not with having friends. You and Mobius were the first. [ And his feelings for her are so much more complicated than his feelings for Mobius. ]
At least half of being the charismatic prince is just being a good liar.
[ Comes out before he can even think better of it. Because above all else he does hope they are friends, even if his heart and body want more than that from her. ]
I hope that's not all we are, [ he admits, and there's some hesitance in his voice. ] If we're being honest.
[ She hopes so too, hopes they're friends. Hopes he can forgive her. But this Loki hadn't traveled the rift, hadn't battled Alioth, hadn't promised her that he wouldn't betray her and yet did. She hadn't betrayed him in turn by sending him away. It would eat at her, heart and soul to let this go anywhere with someone who still looks at her with fondness, still holds her in such a regard as he did. Who she's still lying to by obmission.
He doesn't deserve this. She doesn't deserve it. For different reasons.
[ There's a noise on the other end; Loki taking a breath and it gets caught, somewhere in the middle, before he lets it out and tries again. ]
Alright.
[ Did he say the wrong thing? Or is it more complicated than that? He hates not knowing, even on a good day, even when he isn't certain the other parties involved aren't keeping things from him, but he won't push for that information.
He knows that pushing will just move her further from him, either way. But he can't help how much it feels like rejection. ]
[ He'd moved to put the crystal away on a bedside table, but when she speaks his name...
It's obvious, he imagines, just how much he loves her. He feels as if he's been broadcasting it since her arrival and isn't sure how he feels about that in particular. If it looks as obvious as it feels to him, someone else is going to pick up on it sooner than later. ]
[ It may be overwhelmingly obvious to anyone who has had even an inkling of an even passingly consistent relationship, but all of this is so foreign to her that she knows there’s something there, knows she feels something strong for him, knows that It’s more than just simply platonic. But love? That word really doesn’t belong to or apply to her does it?
This though? She can’t just leave it like this. ]
You are my friend. [ She replies finally, a bit rushed, prodded by his reminder that he’s waiting. ] My… only… friend.
[I won't be your only friend for long he wants to promise, because he's sure that will be true. She'll hit her stride, she'll find people who are drawn to her in the same ways he is. His friends will be nosy. She'll make her own.
He doesn't say it.
He says, instead: ] You don't have to thank me for that.
[ She doesn’t believe that, honestly. If he ever finds out, if she ever gets up the nerve to tell him, he’ll want nothing to do with her. She’s certain of it.
But for now she just smiles a little sadly to herself and tucks the crystal away. ]
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rosecarmine
(no subject)
Date: 2021-12-17 04:53 am (UTC)I think she could forgive it.
Alternatively, I could bribe her into coming along. She'd probably be amused by that, actually.
(no subject)
Date: 2021-12-19 11:20 pm (UTC)[ She's not sure if that's true, but Loki would know better than her. She really hasn't spent much time getting to know anyone here, and alternately Loki seems to have made some connections in the time he's been here. She takes a soft breath, her next words a bit more serious. ]
I'm glad you've made some friends here.
[ That he's not been entirely alone. ]
(no subject)
Date: 2021-12-20 12:59 am (UTC)I'm still waiting for it to fall spectacuarly apart, but somehow it hasn't, yet.
[ It'll probably happen when he's least expecting it. Seems like the sort of trick fate would play on him. ]
I'm not popular, by any stretch of the imagination. The native variant wasn't either, honestly, but I'd like to think I'm doing a little better in that regard.
[ Has Loki crafted visibly thriving friendships as a big competition between himself and a version of him that doesn't even know he exists?
Maybe. ]
(no subject)
Date: 2021-12-21 01:09 am (UTC)I am not you.
She could be happy enough that he even wanted to talk to her after what she's done couldn't she? ]
I'm sure it won't; collecting friends seems to be in your nature. Part of being the charismatic prince.
[ Unlike her, within the few days they'd been on the same path he had collected all sorts along the way. In the end, she always ended up alone. ]
(no subject)
Date: 2021-12-23 12:56 am (UTC)I'm familiar with using people, not with having friends. You and Mobius were the first. [ And his feelings for her are so much more complicated than his feelings for Mobius. ]
At least half of being the charismatic prince is just being a good liar.
(no subject)
Date: 2021-12-23 01:08 am (UTC)Is that what we are? Friends?
(no subject)
Date: 2021-12-23 01:11 am (UTC)[ Comes out before he can even think better of it. Because above all else he does hope they are friends, even if his heart and body want more than that from her. ]
I hope that's not all we are, [ he admits, and there's some hesitance in his voice. ] If we're being honest.
(no subject)
Date: 2021-12-23 01:54 am (UTC)He doesn't deserve this. She doesn't deserve it. For different reasons.
Sylvie swallows hard, her voice very quiet. ]
I'll talk to you later Loki.
(no subject)
Date: 2021-12-23 02:00 am (UTC)Alright.
[ Did he say the wrong thing? Or is it more complicated than that? He hates not knowing, even on a good day, even when he isn't certain the other parties involved aren't keeping things from him, but he won't push for that information.
He knows that pushing will just move her further from him, either way. But he can't help how much it feels like rejection. ]
We'll talk later.
(no subject)
Date: 2021-12-23 02:11 am (UTC)Of course.
[ She almost leaves it out there, but then winces, taking in half a breath- ]
Loki?
(no subject)
Date: 2021-12-23 08:00 pm (UTC)[ He'd moved to put the crystal away on a bedside table, but when she speaks his name...
It's obvious, he imagines, just how much he loves her. He feels as if he's been broadcasting it since her arrival and isn't sure how he feels about that in particular. If it looks as obvious as it feels to him, someone else is going to pick up on it sooner than later. ]
I'm here.
(no subject)
Date: 2021-12-24 02:50 am (UTC)This though? She can’t just leave it like this. ]
You are my friend. [ She replies finally, a bit rushed, prodded by his reminder that he’s waiting. ] My… only… friend.
Thank you… for that.
(no subject)
Date: 2021-12-24 04:57 am (UTC)He doesn't say it.
He says, instead: ] You don't have to thank me for that.
No matter what, I'll always be your friend.
(no subject)
Date: 2021-12-24 10:58 am (UTC)But for now she just smiles a little sadly to herself and tucks the crystal away. ]